A small child, when given the choice of A or B will invariably choose the square root of A divided by B.
An alternate definition of Boy: A loud noise covered in dirt.
By age three, “Why?” is not a question, it’s a fine art, a meditation, a merry-go-round you just can’t get off.
Utter the words, “My children will never…” is the very worst kind of karma.
Red pop, hot dogs and a car sick kid are a deadly combination.
Even kids who have never seen Sponge Bob, Barney, The Wiggles or will magically know and sing the songs… over, and over, and over…
The combined evil genius of a four and two year old should not be underestimated.
Laughter is an art perfected in infancy
College is excellent preparation for parenthood: you learn to exist on little to no sleep, function with a hangover, and eat cold pizza or ramen noodles for breakfast.
Factory work is excellent preparation for parenthood: you learn to do the same tasks over, and over, and over, and over and no one says, “Thank you.”
It is possible for two boys, working together, to completely dismantle and destroy a toilet with only two matchbox cars and their bare hands as tools.
There’s nothing funnier to parents (or more shocking to non parents) at a dinner party than a naked preschooler pressing himself against a sliding glass door and then smearing himself back and forth and around until his junk looks like something from a Salividor Dali painting.
With three boys, urination is a team sport: snapshot: big boy, belled up to the pot, tiny boy knees on one rim, hands on the other, carefully pointing “down”, middle boy aiming carefully under tiny boy’s armpit. Big boy shouting, “Ready guys, ONE, TWO, THREE, GO!”
Toddlers are easier than teens: if you cannot find them, they are generally just under the couch.
Teens are easier than toddlers: they never stick their fingers under the bathroom door while you’re showering to ask if you’re done yet or if they can have a cookie.
Everything: carpet, furniture, clothing, curtains, stuffed animals, EVERYTHING, should colour coordinate with peanut butter.
No matter what you do, someone will assure you that you’re doing it very, very wrong.
Do your best, every day. Your “best” will vary. That’s okay. Do your best.
Don’t be surprised if your daughter and her bestie cut their hair off and jam it into a heating register to hide the evidence.
All those things your parents said that you swore you’d never say. You will say them. With pride.
The quality of a day is measured in dirt between little toes.
Reading aloud to kids is time well spent. So is a bubble bath alone.
The best thing I can do for my kids today is to take care of myself.
Children do not appreciate the precarious nature of their existence.
Date night: When you get away from the kids long enough to talk about the kids and worry about the kids.
Quote from my cousin Griff: “Parenthood, where you allow your children to get your way.”
Having children is a form of enlightenment: it opens your eyes to entire worlds, both inner and outer, that you never knew were there.
When toddlerhood passes, you stop hearing the music.
When a teenager asks for a snuggle, put down whatever you are doing and unfold your lap as big as you can.
“Just nufing!” is a worrisome answer to the question, “What are you doing in there?”
Although it stings a little as you witness your little bundle of joy rapidly changes his clothing preference, it’s actually a normal phase every parent has to deal with. Not to sound dramatic, but you can actually turn this transition period into something that is beneficial to your child as he gets older. In fact, you can help your child cope with the fast changing fashion trends with some helpful tips we have provided below:
According to fashion blogger Ashley Henshaw, “before any shopping trip, remind yourself of the basics. That is to say, your child’s lifestyle should ultimately play a role in choosing his clothes. Many kids spend a significant amount of time running, playing, goofing around, and doing other things that could potentially rip or stain their clothes.” Always go for practicality—remember, less is more.
Having a wide array of children’s clothes can actually come in handy. Your child’s M&S Autograph Lace Pleated Lightweight Top can be layered with a dark colored cardigan which comes appropriately for this season. Carrots For Michaelmas suggested that “learning to layer clothing appropriately lets you stretch out those spring and summer clothes a little longer. This comes in handy when your children are not born in the same 3 months of the year – layers can keep you from having to buy a whole new sized wardrobe for that lone child who had the audacity to be born in the winter instead of the summer.”
It is true that clothes made of high quality materials can last longer. “My son has been sporting a hand-me-down pair of Keen sandals that were bought new – they’ve been worn by 3 different children already and show no signs of wearing out anytime soon. Quality can also signal a better fit, and nothing will get an item of clothing sent to the bottom of the pile faster than a child’s discomfort,” blogger Molly W shared.
Everyone enjoys taking a good vacation with their kids. However, vacationers who think outside the box always look forward to activities that are unique, enjoyable and, most of all, memorable. Of course, you can have a bucket of fun without emptying your pocketbook. And, yes, this is possible while vacationing with your kids in New York. It is simply a matter of finding out beforehand what places are available and deciding what to do once you get there. When the kids know what to expect, they will be ready for adventurous times that call for little or no spending and you can start with a reasonably priced New York City Hotel there are a few that are family friendly on Hostelbookers.com such as the Royal Park Hotel. To get you started here are five children’s activities that can last a lifetime.
A Thousand-Word Friendship
Naturally, children are very sociable creatures. They also enjoy outdoor activities like playground fun. Once they arrive at the site, unlike many adults, they join in the playtime and share smiles and laughter with their newly-found friends. The idea is to take them to a playground such as Bleecker, Pier 51 or Downing Street. Equipped in advance with their own inexpensive camera, have them take snapshots with their buddies. Once the friendship has been established, with parental consent, they can exchange ways to stay in contact: A picture is worth a thousand words.
Play Dough Liberty-for-All Outing
Few people will go to New York without taking in the view of the Statue of Liberty. Of course, a long wait is usually unavoidable. The waiting time is a great opportunity for the kids to enjoy an cheap sit-down picnic at a nearby playground. While there, they can draw sketches of the statue and surrounding areas. Following the viewing they can re-construct the scene using play dough on hard cardboard.
Hook, Line and Sinker Adventure
Lakes, ponds, rivers and streams are in abundance in New York. So, there is no shortage of fishing opportunities. Instead of getting dressed up and attending an expensive activity, get dressed down, pack a basket and head on out to catch your choice of coldwater, saltwater or warmwater fish of all kinds. Recreational fishing is a memorable time for kids when they have their own equipment and are allowed to experiment for themselves. Children under age sixteen do not need a fishing license.
Sunrise and Sunset Watch
New York sunrise and sunset are gorgeous and fascinating. Watching them is a free activity that the kids will enjoy. Not only will they bask in the glow of the suns’ magnificent radiance, but it will broaden their perspective of nature. Wherever and whenever they behold another similar sight, they will be able to compare and contrast. With their personal inexpensive cameras, they can capture the sun’s brilliance in print.
Tree Rubbing – The Central Park Highlight
Visiting Central Park is one of the main highlights of vacationing in New York. Prior to taking a trip to this historical location, the kids should be taught how to do a tree rubbing. During their walk, let them select a tree of their choice to do the rub. To conclude this fabulous experience of nature, they can frame the finished product to keep as a souvenir.
When it comes to kids having fun, even if it’s on a budget, it does not take much to please them. Likewise, when taking them on vacation to New York, it does not have to take too much money either. As long as the activities are kids-appropriate, they will love the experience. The important thing is to plan in advance. The preparation will pay off because they will have the tools needed for the individual experiences that will last them for years to come.
July is “birthday season” at our house, with three of the four children leveling up within a three week period. How we managed to pop out four in that tight a window over a ten year period is a subject of great mystery and amusement in our family. The result? A non-stop parade of balloons and leftover cake that guarantees my desire for pie when my birthday rolls around, the first week of August.
This year is a special year because Elisha is turning 13, and turning 13 is kind of a big deal in our family. It’s the point at which we expect our kids to be ready to start taking the reins of their own lives. We consider them demi-dults (not dolts!) who can be relied upon to pull their own weight and some of someone else’s too. It’s the age at which we welcome them into the adult world and encourage them to step up to that very big plate, insofar as they are able. It’s not about the age, really, that’s just a convenient mile marker; it’s about celebrating the magical change that causes a little kid to all of a sudden fill very big shoes. It’s not like yesterday they were “little kids” that we were bossing around 24-7 and today they’re free wheeling adults. Very little changes on the outside, but we mark an external milestone on the inner journey. It’s an opportunity to celebrate the growth and maturity of a young person, the individuality and creative genius of one kid at a time, and to encourage the passions and dreams of each of our kids as they step over the threshold into a new and exciting phase of life.
It is a great sadness to me that the Arts are being pulled from public schools.
With budget crunches, faced with the choice of fire a math teacher or let go an art teacher, when funding is dependent on test scores… tests in which art and music do not appear, it’s easy to understand why the choices are made. Still, it makes me sad, as a teacher, as a parent, and as a member of the larger community who believes that it’s the arts that give the sciences meaning, and form, much of the time.
As with most things, children pick up a love for the arts because it’s modeled for them. One of my husband’s most precious memories as a child was his Dad taking him to see the opera, Carmen. I’ve never been to an opera, but I remember my parents spending the big bucks to take us to see stage productions and ballets, and cultural dance performances in Mexico. I’ll never forget seeing Guys and Dolls, starring Liza Minelli, at the Pantageous Theater in Los Angeles. I felt so cosmopolitan. (more…)